A psychologist shares: How to turn a maybe into a YES
Weโve all been there. Youโre flush with the excitement of a big idea. You know itโs going to rock your clientโs world. You swing a time to see her, arrive filled with nervous anticipation and then set out your plan, covering every detail.
When youโre done, you glance across the table, waiting for the enthusiastic โYes! Letโs do it.โ The client pauses, you hold your breath and they say โฆ
โHmmm, maybe.โ
What? Thatโs not the response you were looking for. Short of mind control, how do you convince them of the brilliance of your proposal?
Your sales conversations are some of the trickier interactions of life – and it doesnโt matter if youโre selling a product to a customer or vegetables to your kids. You need to convince another person to believe that what youโre โsellingโ is worth their time, money, emotion or tastebuds.
You can recognise a challenging conversation by these three elements:
We can respond to challenging conversations in a number of ways. We mightโฆ
These strategies all work in the short term but longer term? Youโre getting nowhere.
The good news? There is a simple five-step process that will get you from โmaybeโ (or โnoโ) to โyes!โ
Itโs important to remember the aim of a challenging conversation is to have an effect or create action. You want something to happen. A new customer signed up, an exciting project kicked off or an invoice paid. ย The process in every conversation, difficult or not, looks like this:
Here are the mistakes that can be made at each stage:
Speaker: Our message is unclear because we havenโt thought it through and planned it out. Have you ever launched into a conversation and while your mouth is speaking your mind is wondering, โWhere is this going? Do I know what Iโm saying?โ
Message: We donโt use a means of communication that best suits our audience. Email? Phone? Face to face? Presentation? Coffee chat? Plenty of detail? Overview only? One meeting or a series?
Audience: We donโt talk to the right person. Is this the decision maker? Are you using the right language?
Effect: Weโre unsure of the effect we want. Sure, you want a sale but is it a one-off or a longer-term relationship? Do you want it today or this year? Is this customer the gatekeeper to other sales?
It seems obvious but we often launch into conversations without a plan. Your goal is to convince your client to say โyesโ but is there more to it? Can you anticipate their likely response? Do you have a plan for countering it? Is there a more compelling way to have this conversation? A product demonstration perhaps? A slide show? Case study? A thought provoking location?
Have you thought about your emotional response? How will you handle disappointment, frustration, jubilation? What are the possibilities and pitfalls?
Do you have your next steps in mind? If they say yes, then what?
Take the time to plan your conversation in detail so that you can counter any opposition, capitalise on possibilities and handle it with aplomb.
Humans are inherently self-absorbed, particularly when emotion is involved. We focus on what we want and need, our goals and our worries. Consider for a moment the other person in this conversation. What would help them? How does they like to receive information? Do they see the situation in the same way you do? Are you making assumptions about their point of view? Is there something else you can offer? Can you do more? Should you do less?
Spend time pondering both sides of conversation before you begin. You might be surprised at what you discover and where you can increase the likelihood of a positive outcome.
Ask questions! Put your sales pitch on hold and seek to understand what they want and need before you tell them what you have to offer. Questions are an incredibly powerful but under-used tool in every conversation. What? How? When? Who? Where? Open questions build relationships (everyone likes someone whoโs interested) and they can uncover fascinating facts, insights and perspectives.
Try solution-focused and โweโ questions such as, โHow do you think we couldโฆ?โโ and โWhat would you like to see?โ
Use as few words as you need to and stick to your goal. Listen to yourself as you speak and ask, โAm I waffling? Have I made my point? Have I asked enough questions? Should I just shut up and let her speak?โ
If in doubt, ask a question and sit in silence. A silent pause gives you time to collect your thoughts and to refocus on your preparation and strategy. Silence also uncovers possibilities. Try looking attentive, interested and expectantly at your conversation partner and see what arises. Theyโll say something, I assure you, and it could lead to the pot of gold.
Like anything, practice makes better, if not perfect. Prepare well for your next โmaybeโ conversation, execute your plan and then revisit and review. What went well? What didnโt? What can you do differently next time? Review the plan and execute again, and again, and again.
Follow the plan and you will turn that โmaybeโ into โyesโ. (And if you want some practice feel free to try the above on getting your kids to eat their vegetables!)
Do you have any favourite strategies for dealing with challenging conversations and getting people to say โYESโ?!
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