An RBD consists of unexpected and usually unwelcome events. It could include a promised payment not coming through when the tax is due tomorrow.
Next you may get a โYour application has not been successfulโ letter. And to top it off, the neighbours will choose that day to begin sunup-to-sunset, buzzsaw-symphony renovations.
As a soloist who works from home, I donโt have workmates to commiserate with about my run of obstacles. Plus nobody ever tells you that the wonderful world of solo business can be frustrating, annoying and downright disheartening when you take successive knocks.
But Iโve found that stewing doesnโt really help. It is much more productive, and feels way better, to do the things that allow my natural resilience to come to the fore. As such, over the years Iโve developed a little kitbag of activities, business survival skills and approaches that minimise the impact of the RBDs.
1. Breathe, itโs all going to be okay
The first thing I do, as the bumper sticker says, is remember to breathe. I know my capacity to cope and make tough decisions will be helped enormously by getting oxygen to my brain. Iโve found this simple step is surprisingly absent when under stress. While I breathe, I remind myself that I am capable of handling this and no matter what happens, everything will be okay. I know I have faced adversity in the past and I will face it in the future. Itโs just part of life and I can get through it.
2. Try to ascertain: why is this so important?
It can be quite surprising what my reaction to an RBD reveals about what I think is important. Recently I was shocked to realise that I was catastrophising an event because I still wanted the approval of others and still felt a competitive need to win at all costs. Sometimes my reaction is something as simple as wanting my work not to be in vain. Once I understand whatโs behind my response then I can bring my focus back to what is really important. Do I have loving and supportive friends and family? Am I doing meaningful work? Am I laughing? If those things still exist then Iโm doing okay.
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3. Take action
You know the saying, โWhat you focus on is what you becomeโ? Iโve found that ruminating on a problem gets me nowhere. For me, itโs essential to do something tangible which shows me that I continue to have choices and can be an active player in my own life. It could be the simplest of phone calls to query a letter, sitting down and revising my business plan, or talking to a friend to get a second opinion or different perspective. Okay, vent.
4. Change my state
Sometimes, despite doing all of the above, my mind will continue churning through the situation. Itโs then that I know I need to actively change my state. If I need to bounce back quickly there are simple activities such as journaling, going for a walk, meditating, watching TV, or calling a friend which will shift my focus. It just needs to be something that will short-circuit the cognitive loop thatโs locked into the problem.
5. Stay optimistic and mindful
While I have no delusions of being able to control everything in my world, I do know there are business survival skills I can develop which work for me in times of adversity. By being optimistic and having a positive focus while being aware of reality, I am better equipped to bounce back in business and in life. Iโve also found ongoing mindfulness, and an acceptance of the is-ness of business diffuses a lot of the drama associated with adversity as I come to accept that my RBD is just my interpretation.
In fact, perhaps instead of dreading the Really Bad Day, from now on Iโll look fondly on my RBD days as the times when I made Really Brilliant Decisions.
So whatโs in your bouncing back kitbag? What business survival skills help you keep going through the hard times as a soloist?
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